I remember when I was little watching track and field events on the sidelines as my dad was coaching. I can still visualize the swift, powerful movement of the human body soaring over the hurdles.
Today I jumped a huge hurdle.
Today my hurdle was in mind. I prepared for my big jump last night as I talked to John and worked through some mind blocks. I stetched tight muscles so to speak as I reminded myself of who I really am. I acknowledged some thoughts that were tripping me up and causing me to slam face forward into the hurdle in front of me.
And so this morning with my mind reset, I walked into our home gym again like I belonged there. I set my intention and I jumped. I jumped over a pile of painful emotions and a huge stack of lies that I have been feeding myself for weeks, and I left them in the distance.
It matters not how much I lifted in comparison to what I was capable of before- before grief impacted my abilities, before injury shut me down, before my heart capsized under the weight of it all.
It matters only that I jumped over what I was able to do yesterday. And tomorrow I will jump again, over whatever stands in my way, even if all that stands in my way are the lies in my head.
I’m done. I’m just done.
I refuse to measure my strength by the number on a dumbell or my beauty by the number on a scale.
I refuse to quit because of the lies that try to tell me that I’m broken. I refuse to sit down and let them crush me with their terrible echoes. I refuse.
I am strong.
I am brave.
I am enough.
I am beautiful.
I am worthy.
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