“Oh what’s love got to do, got to do with it?
What’s love but a second hand emotion?
What’s love got to do, got to do with it?
Who needs a heart,
When a heart can be broken?”
If you’ve loved and had your heart broken, you know what it means to try to put a lock on your heart, determined to prevent that heartache from ever happening again. The problem with that, is that we were created for love. We long to be loved, to be truly known. It is so much easy to throw out a “who needs a heart, when a heart can be broken” type response. In the midst of the pain of rejection, we try to convince ourselves that we just didn’t need love in the first place. That sounds safe doesn’t it?
But it doesn’t work that way. We try to love again, allowing ourselves to be vulnerable. Because deep down, we want to be loved, we long to be known.
We were created for it.
So we step into love again, with a guard around our heart.
“It may seem to you,
That I’m acting confused,
When you’re close to me.
If I tend to look dazed,
I’ve read it someplace,
I’ve got cause to be.”
I’ve been taking on a new direction
But I have to say
I’ve been thinking about my own protection
It scares me to feel this way…”
It is absolutely terrifying to trust your heart in the hands of another after being wounded. Sometimes it means forgiving a person you love deeply and allowing that love to keep growing even after deep pain.Sometimes it means walking away from rejected love and trusting your heart to another.
I’ve know the pain of rejection, and have walked through the process of forgiving and learning to love again. I’ve loved others through the filter of my own pain, and even projected that into new relationships. Having walked this out in my own life, gives me a deeper ability to relate to my own child who is struggling to love and be loved.
I get it. It is so much easier to push back and pretend not to care to “put up our own protection” because we’re “scared to feel this way.”
What does love have to do with it anyway?
It has absolutely EVERYTHING to do with it.
It’s all about love.
We are all a bunch of broken hearted souls trying to love other broken hearted souls. Whether it’s in your marriage or in your friendships, whether it’s a relationship with your mother or your daughter, your father or your son, I encourage you today to take a deep breath of grace and pour out mercy upon those you are trying desperately to love. Whether you’re the one pushing back with the guarded heart, or whether you’re the one trying to love one who keeps pushing you away, take that deep breath and shift your perspective. Love out of a place of mercy today, and choose to let yourself be loved as well.
Emma with Daddy in 2009. Taking a deep breath and stepping into love.
Credits to Terry Britten and Graham Lyle co-writers of “What’s Love Got to Do With It” and to Ms. Tina Turner for popularizing this song.