There’s a Lump in My Throat

As we get closer and closer to Mattie’s Homecoming, I find that periodically I get a huge lump in my throat. This is super duper emotional folks. For 11 months, my son has lived inside the four walls (or curtains) of a hospital. My son has never been outside except to be whisked onto a helicopter or an airplane. This is all he has know. There is so much more, and it is all just around the corner.

The lump in my throat is caused by two realities.

First is the reality that Mattie is about to spend his first night under the same roof as the family who loves him. He is about to have the sun shine on his face. He is about to feel grass touch his toes. He is about to roll around on the floor of his very own bedroom. He is about to snuggle on the couch and take a nap with his Daddy. He is about to be greeted by the faces of brothers and sisters each morning. He is about to hear laughter and music and noises of love (and craziness) all around him. He is about to experience his first play dates with little friends. He will get to go to church, take a trip to the zoo, and go to the park. I don’t know about you, but that puts a lump in my throat that nearly takes my breath away.

Second is the reality that we will be saying goodbye to an incredible group of people who have cared for Mattie with compassion, kindness, and professionalism for the past 9 months at Children’s Mercy Hospital in Kansas City. These people are like family to us. I mean that. They are our family. Doctors, Surgeons, Nurse Practitioners, Nurses, Therapists, and Secretaries. We have developed special relationships with them. Many of them have been directly involved in saving Mattie’s life. They have stood beside us through grieve and pain and have rejoiced with us over every little milestone. They have taken the time not only to care for our sweet son, but to watch out for John and I too. They have welcomed our children on their many visits to see their little brother. They have done everything they could do to allow us to be a family, even in the midst of what has been the most challenging journey of our lives.

We are so grateful.

And for a little trip down memory lane:
Newborn Mattie

Mattie Arrives in Kansas City

Mattie’s First Christmas

February 2011 (Just before his tracheostomy)

Mattie just a few days after his tracheostomy

The whole family together!

Mattie just before his first heart surgery. It still amazes me to see my boy looking so very very sick.

Mattie post-PA band (his first heart surgery)

Mattie just before his AV Canal (his 2nd heart surgery)

Mattie in recovery after his AV Canal repair

The Famous Spa Baby

Dr. Matthias Loux

Party Day! Mattie’s first taste of icing!

I just betcha you’ve got a lump in your throat now too.


13 thoughts on “There’s a Lump in My Throat

  1. I do. The lump. That last picture got me. I am slightly jealous, though, I have to admit. I’ve followed Mattie’s journey, feel like I know you all, and have prayed so hard. I wish I could be there to experience all the firsts that you mentioned above. LUMP. Enjoy it all and savor every moment. I know you will. Blessings… and prayers to continue from all of us (the reedettes). Kerry Reed and kids.

  2. I do!!! But it is followed by a lot of PRAISE DANCING AND WORSHIP!!!! Because Mattie you are soo very amazing!!! And soo is your family!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. Kerry, I feel the same way! But trust me, I’ll be blogging like crazy all those wonderful firsts! And someday you’d better make your way for a visit to KC!

  4. Yep, big ol’ lump in my throat! In looking back through those pics I just kept thinking, How great is our God!!!!!!!! His hand has been on sweet Mattie from the womb! Praising Jesus for giving Mattie life! Welcome home sweet boy!

  5. i have been praying for your family for the day when he would be able to come home,i have a huge lump in my throat and tears in my eyes as well as a smile in my heart,im so happy for you guys:)

  6. You know I have a lump in my throat……..and tears in my eyes. If I lived closer, I’d be standing in your driveway jumping up & down like a maniac when your van pulls into the driveway on Homecoming Day. (There may have been pom poms involved, but we’ll never know.) I may not be able to be there in person, but I’ll be jumping up & down at home, believe me – and praying, of course and looking forward to reading about all of Mattie’s firsts! : )

  7. So excited that your little man gets to come home so soon…and I don’t even know you! 😉 Praying God’s grace and favor for you.

  8. I’ve been so busy I missed this post. I love the history – Did you notice how red his hair looked in the Christmas picture and now it has all of those beautiful curls. I also couldn’t believe how sick he looked before his first surgery – took my breath way – my husband looked over and said “is everything okay” Ihad to answer “God is good and faithful” LOVE YOU GUYS


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