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Ratio for the Day- 3:1

6:52AM- Emma’s crying. Not moaning like she usually does, I’m used to that. Crying. I get out of bed, ask her what’s wrong; she just stares at me and continues to cry. I try to explain- it’s still dark out, go back to sleep, and all that good stuff. Didn’t work. I take her to the bathroom and let her in so she can sit and watch Daddy get ready for the day. I flop back in bed. Elia, who has been in our bed since 3AM or some crazy hour like that, kicks me in the head.

7:15AM- I get up. It’s inevitable. Small people need me. Have I ever mentioned that I’m not a morning person? It’s not like I need to sleep in until some crazy late hour, I’m just not very nice in the morning. I get a very large cup of coffee.

7:35AM- I remind myself what the day will look like. I take another long swig of coffee. Because I stayed in bed til 7:15 and because this day is not like all the rest, I resign myself to the fact that I will not get a shower today. I splash water on my face, slap on some makeup in 2.3 minutes, and throw on some jeans, a t-shirt, and a much needed hat- a hat that I am still wearing at 10:26PM.

7:whateverAM- I dress the little ones (formerly known as “The Toddlers”), feed them cinnamon raisin toast and bananas. I actually remember to feed myself and have an english muffin with peanut butter.

8:45AM- I head out the door with the little ones and load them in the van. John and Nick get in the truck, and I explain to crying little ones why they are not in Daddy’s truck. First errand of the day- stopped at a friends house, who happens to be my doctor and had her read my TB test. The little ones decide they need to go in too. Aiden escapes and goes upstairs. I realize where he is and ask, “No one’s sleeping are they?” Friend says, “Yes,” just as Aiden appears at the top of the stairs with his finger to his lips saying, “Shhhhh” and making the sign for “sleep.”

9:05AM- Load ’em up and move ’em out. On the road again to deliver a stack of paperwork to our social worker’s office. We sing multiple children’s songs loudly the whole way there. Get the little ones out of the van, make a train into the building, ride the elevator, look at the giant fish in the insurance company’s office, slide papers under social workers door, ride the elevator down after looking at the fish one more time, and make a train back to the van.

9:30AM- Head to Target. Say a quick prayer that the little ones don’t realize that they outnumber me. Fill the cart, get a free cookie at the bakery, check out, and decline cashier’s offer to get me help to the van. The little ones notice the sliver of the moon that is still in the sky and are baffled.

10:10AM- Arrive at Baby Gap to exchange some 3T shirts that I realize are too small for Aiden. I explain to the little ones that they are to stay right beside me in the store (offer a bribe for those that comply). Really awesome clerk takes my pile of shirt and gets them all in 4T’s while I head to the “potty” with three children who claim to have a need to go “pee pee.” No one pees of course, but everyone explores the bathroom- soap, water, towels, flushing. Fun for all. I’m sweating by now. Head back out and find jeans because they are on sale, and I have a punch card that will get me on sale jeans plus a free pair cause I have so many hineys that need jeans. Oops, we have to pee again because according to Elia, she “didn’t sit long enough.” I try to convince her she doesn’t and she says loudly for the whole store to hear,  “I can feel it in my butt.” Back to the potty, because the only thing worse than having to take three children back to the bathroom for a second time, would be for even one of the three to pee their pants in Baby Gap. Go to the check out. Tried to have them all stand by me with their hand holding the edge of the counter. That worked for 3.5 secs until Aiden escaped, entered the cashiers zone and started using the store phone. Take two. Give each child a digital watch (at the checkout) to hold while I pay for our loot. They pull tags off watches. I pay. We leave.

10:30AM- John calls. Could I please bring some water to the studio. Sure. No problem. I’m Super Woman. We head to CVS, because it seems the simplest solution to procuring a case of water while keeping three little ones from running away. Enter CVS, grab water and then realize that I cannot hold anyone’s hand while hefting a case of water. Deep sigh. Girls follow me willingly after being reminded that they will get to have a treat for being good at Target. Aiden finds strapping tape and Crocks. Girls score a gigantic bag of “Dum Dums.” I check out while explaining that no we will not be buying Mentos, Altiods, or gum of any kind.

10:50AM- Leave CVS with case of water and large bag of Dum Dums. Girls make a train like good little girls. Aiden does not. I see Aiden in the doorway, but he does not come. The automatic door closes on him. Aiden could care less. Elia screams, “The door trapped my brother!!!!” Old guy looks at us like we are a freak show. I open the van toss our loot in and get the girls in the back seat in 2.7 seconds. I activate the automatic door to CVS and retrieve the “brother.”

11:10AM- Drop water off at studio. Get kisses from Daddy all around. He tells me I look hot. I roll my eyes.

11:25AM- Return home for lunch.

12:00PM-Lunch

12:30PM- I wrassle the little ones down for naps after everyone pees (multiple times), gets a drink, washes hands, and finds their binky. I scarf down food and settle down to all the emails that I was not able to respond to via Blackberry while running errands.

1:15PM- It is evident that Elia will not nap today. She joins me to “work” on the couch. She eats “Auntie Ann’s Bunny Grahams.” So do I.

2:24PM- Aiden and Emma wake up.

2:27PM- I get a text from John, “Must have salt-n-vinegar chips.” (Apparently eating these nasty things helps the vocal cords.)

2:30PM- I get everyone changed and put their shoes back on. Load them up in the van on a mission to take Daddy a “snack.”  Head to the 711 near the studio, park in front, lock kids in, run in. NO SALT-N-VINEGAR chips. Head back toward home. Hit up another gas station. NO SALT-N-VINEGAR chips. Run to CVS. Unload the little ones, run in. NO SALT-N-VINEGAR chips. Rush out. Head to price chopper. Discover that Aiden is missing a shoe. Search the van from head to toe. No shoe. Throw the three little ones in a normal sized cart like sardines, head into the lovely Price Chopper. Procure three large bags of SALT-N-VINEGAR chips because I am NOT going to buy another one of those for a very long time. Run back to CVS. I park at the front door, lock the van, put the 4 ways on, and poke my head far enough in the door to ask, “Did you find a little boy’s sneaker?” Yes they did.

3:30PM (Yes it took me an hour to buy chips!) Pick up Nick from work. Deliver the stinkin’ chips to the studio.

3:45PM Arrive home to get Nicks drum gear. Take Nick to the studio. Unload drum gear.

4:30PM Pick up Tay and Belle from school. Take 5 kids out to dinner because I deserve it. Notice on FB (while eating) that a friend is looking for a business space rental. I saw one yesterday so I call him. Have 30 minutes before my next “appointment” so I run to the rental property and get the phone number. Take photo of sign and building and text it to friend.

6:00PM Pick up dinner for the studio gang from John’s mom. All little people have to suddenly pee when we get to Nana’s house. They pee.  We deliver dinner to the studio.

6:40PM Kept the promise that I made at 9AM and finally take the little ones to the playground.

7:15PM Home. Put the little ones to bed. (Normal bedtime drama ensues.)

7:30PM Clean and Rearrange family room furniture, clean up kitchen, load dishwasher.

8:30PM Wii fit declared that I am overweight and old.

8:45PM I work on adoption profiles and answer emails.

11:21PM I question why I am still awake as I finish this post.

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19 thoughts on “Ratio for the Day- 3:1

  1. Now why in the world would you get on Wii Fit after a day like that. And why in the world would you care what Wii fit says about you, you are in fact a super mamma. Now go get yourself a nanny or if nothing else a personal assistant,

  2. Oh dear…….that is a crazy day! Nothing like having several youngins with you 🙂 When you drive 45 min to get anywhere- we are always having to find bathrooms when we arrive….
    I think this is God’s way of stretching us- really really really far 🙂

  3. Phew! Here’s to hoping the TB test read ok… 🙂

    You are a gracious women. I would have been inclined to stomp in the chips.

  4. So i am normally a lurker but i am a future social worker in the KC area (last year at ku) and I am quite curious about your need for a tb test and your dropping papers at a your sw’ers?? whose coming home ? 🙂

  5. Did the wii fit go “ohhhhh, thats overweight” like it does every time I look at it? And then I step on and it goes “oofh”

    I love when my electronics insult me.

    Also, I really enjoyed this post. Your life seems like organized chaos. Oh Aiden. I’m still giggling at “that door trapped my brother!”

  6. Yikes! Reading that makes me feel relieved that I’ve only got one three year old and am not outnumbered by my children! (Subject to change with upcoming adoption, but I’ll enjoy it for now!)

  7. i’m with the other commenter. . . . what’s up at the loux home??? 😉 we know that big fish well . . . if, in fact, it’s the one that we looked at several times too. hmmmmm. . . . . . .fun times, fun times.

  8. Love it! You are truly amazing. Such a wonderful wife. I probable would have told Steven that they stopped making salt and vinager chips so he would have to wait till he got home. 🙂 You are getting lots of jewels in your crown honey.

  9. Wow, how did you document this moment by moment through the day? (wondering because I am not that organized!)

    I love the “I can feel it in my butt” (had me laughing out loud.)

    xoxo
    Kimmie
    mama to 8
    one homemade and 7 adopted

  10. Omygoodness! Can’t imagine! Tho will experience someday I’m sure:)
    This day summed up the other morning for me, just trying to get out of the house, to visit Britt, with my 6wk old (granted I haven’t had one in 19yrs)
    I was contemplating a trip to Target this morning…now after reading this, I think I can do it;)

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