Thinkin’ Out Loud

It goes without saying that this has been an incredibly difficult month. Derek’s death has been one of those earth shattering events that has ripped through our family and has changed us forever. To say that this is hard would be an understatement. Not a day goes by when I don’t think, “I still cannot believe we are walking through this.”

We are a close family. We are holding on tight to each other and clinging to Jesus, who is our only hope. Though we have no understanding of all the “why’s” that are battering around in our brains, we know He loves us.

The devastation in Haiti has also shaken me to the very core. Thoughts of orphans stripped of  the meager provisions that they once had and those newly orphaned because of this disaster rips at my heart.  Watching those I love team up to help rescue and standing ready to care for and love on these precious ones, only to be met with red-tape after red-tape after red-tape, infuriates me. I have no idea how long it will be before Haitian orphans will be adoptable again. I’m grateful for those previously matched who are being united with their families, but I mourn for those who have no mother or father to hold them and comfort them in their grief.

I have watched over the past month as the loss of my brother, Derek, and the devastation in Haiti have provoked many to consider adoption. I have answered countless emails directing people to home studies resources and discussing the various options and needs regarding adoption.

I encourage any of you discouraged by the seemingly slammed-tight-door to Haitian adoptions, to not let that stop you from moving forward to ready yourselves for adoption. There are needs in your own backyard as well as needs all across this nation and around the world. Take that “yes” in your heart and ask the Lord, “What next?” Whether His answer is “Ukraine” or “Ethiopia” or “Uganda” or “The Department of Children’s Services” or “An Infant Spared from an Abortion,” take that yes and run with it.

And I’m not just preaching it, we’re doing it. We just finished handing in our paperwork to update our own home study. John and Derek had just talked a few days before his death about this crazy life of ours. In part of their conversation, they talked about all of the things they had “accomplished” in their lives and how the thing that they knew REALLY counted and REALLY mattered was this thing called “adoption.” They talked about their own desires to love their children well and continue loving and accepting those in who had no fathers. It was brewing on their hearts that day sitting in  the driveway talking, and it is the thing that keeps us walking forward today.

We are more determined than ever as a family to continue to speak out for LIFE and to plead the cause  of the orphan.

Thank you all for your continued support and prayers for our family.

For more information about the situation regarding orphans in Haiti visit my friend Randy Bohlender’s Blog .


9 thoughts on “Thinkin’ Out Loud

  1. My eyes burn with tears reading these words…blessings on your families and may God continue to restore your hearts. Love your heart for adoption! Blessings!

  2. You’re right Tracie, it just takes a “Yes” in our heart and the impossilbe becomes reality.

  3. I’m glad that at least one positive thing coming from the crisis in Haiti is that people are waking up to adoption and specifically adopting African American children. Thank you for pointing out that there are children EVERYWHERE (including the US) that need to be adopted. I have become slightly annoyed lately that when people ask us where are African American daughter is “from” and we answer “Florida” we get the same “oh” answered. It’s kind of deflated sounding and it upsets me. Is my daughter’s adoption less special because she is not foreign? Did she need us any less because she was born in a hospital rather than in a mud hut? The bottom line is that she was born to a mother who was not prepared to take care of her and we were thrilled to be chosen as her parents. I am happy people are considering adoption of any sort but make sure you look outside the realm of what is popular and look at all the opportunities. Haiti may prove difficult to adopt from in the near future but there will always be need there, just as there is in many places, for years to come.

  4. my heart breaks for all of those poor children in Haiti. I keep seeing pictures of children being pulled out of the rubble and do not understand. i just pray God opens the doors for adoption of little Haitian orphans!!!!

  5. I am so sorry for the huge loss your family has suffered losing Derek. I am glad that you guys are adopting again. I wanted you to know that we just committed to Corinna on Reeces Rainbow, so we will eb back on the Ukraine rollercoaster soon!

    Thanks for being a voice for adoption in a world where so few people understand why we are doing this one more time.

  6. The “yes” in my heart has been there for many years…only it has turned to a longing and cry, since we have stopped having biological children and now, Haiti. I am waiting on the Lord to speak to my husband’s heart…will you pray for him? His name is Josh. He knows my desire, even agreed to adoption after miscarrying our second, but it was all put on the shelf during having child #2, #3, and #4 🙂 I feel this is what God has in the future for us, so I’m not worrying over the adoption, it’s the waiting. But, I know that’s a big part of the process itself! Hmmm…maybe you should pray for my patience too. 🙂 Thanks.


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